Category: Uncategorized

The Watchkeeper Chronicles: Then vs. Now by Chef Luis Rafael Hurtado. #24/0230.

December 26, 2024 · 3 min read

---

The Watchkeeper Chronicles: Then vs. Now

It was a crisp December morning, and the boat rocked gently at anchor. Christmas decorations swayed with the rhythm of the sea, and while most of the crew were deep into their much-anticipated day off, one poor soul remained “on watch.” As I strolled past the bridge, I couldn’t help but reflect on the days when being on watch actually meant being on watch—when you used that time to tackle everything you couldn’t do while the boss was onboard or the yacht was on charter.

The Good Old Days

Back in my time (not that long ago, mind you), being on watch meant you earned every bead of sweat. If you were a chef like me, it was a golden opportunity to scrub fridges until they sparkled brighter than the North Star, reorganize the galley’s spice rack alphabetically (twice, just to be sure), and get ahead on mise en place for the next three days. Oh, and inventory—let’s not forget counting each and every potato in the pantry like they were rare gems.

Engineers? They didn’t have it any easier. Their version of a day on watch often involved crawling into the engine room to dismantle a piece of machinery that was probably working just fine—all in the name of “preventative maintenance,” a near-religious practice. Then there were the deckhands, who used their watch shifts to scrub the decks so thoroughly you could shave in their reflection.

It was tough, thankless work, but by the end of your shift, you could look around and say, “I earned my next beer.” And that beer? It tasted like liquid gold.

Enter Katie: The Modern Watchkeeper

These days? Oh, my friends, how times have changed. Take Katie, the current watchkeeper. She’s in her mid-20s, fresh-faced (if you ignore the perpetual cigarette in her hand), and she has a very progressive approach to the art of watchkeeping.

Katie’s interpretation of “watch” involves strategically positioning the yacht’s CCTV feed on her laptop while binge-watching a 12-episode Netflix series titled Love on the High Seas. Or perhaps catching up on the latest episodes of Below Deck. To keep her energy up, she powers through a 12-pack of Heineken, and by hour three, she’s sending WhatsApp voice notes to her boyfriend back home.

“Yeah, babe, it’s super stressful. The waves? Massive. I’m a hero for keeping the boat safe,” she says, puffing on her seventh cigarette of the shift. By the time she’s done, the ashtray is fuller than the fridge she’s supposed to be monitoring.

The $200 Engineer

Then there’s the engineer, a true innovator. Why spend a perfectly good day turning wrenches when you can Venmo a junior deckhand $200 to cover your watch? While his “stand-in” fiddles with dials they barely understand, the engineer is off hitting the golf course, swapping his boiler suit for plaid pants and a visor.

“It’s about efficiency,” he’ll argue, leaning on the idea that delegation is a skill.

The Mate’s Romantic Shopping Spree

And let’s not forget the mate. A man with his priorities in order, he has turned his bridge watch into the perfect opportunity to research engagement rings. Hours are spent scrolling through diamond options while he rehearses his proposal speech in the chart table mirror.

“Does this one scream, ‘I love you,’ or ‘I don’t really know what I’m doing?’” he mutters to himself, as an alarm on the radar pings—likely another vessel approaching. He’ll check on it after narrowing down the ring settings.

Sarcasm vs. Reality

Back in the galley, my chef instincts kick in. The fridges are a mess, a rogue carrot is slowly drying on the counter, and Katie has apparently mistaken a spatula for an ashtray. My soul screams, “Why isn’t anyone scrubbing?!” But then I shrug. These are different times. Maybe the new generation is redefining what “watchkeeping” really means. Perhaps it’s more of a spiritual practice now—one that involves self-care, browsing Amazon for things you don’t need, books you’ll never read, screen time, and Heineken.

With a deep sigh, I grab a mop and start detailing the galley myself. Some traditions, after all, are worth keeping alive.

Feliz Navidad! 🎄

A Culinary Ode to the Mediterranean: The Art of Paella by Chef Luis Rafael Hurtado. #24/0225.

December 22, 2024 · 1 min read

---

Behold the symphony of colors and aromas in this vibrant paella—an edible masterpiece crafted with passion and precision. Each grain of saffron-infused rice glows like molten gold, carrying the essence of both sea and land. Tender shreds of chicken intertwine with succulent seafood, their flavors melding into a tantalizing dance that evokes sunlit shores and gentle ocean breezes.

Emerald-green peas punctuate the dish, offering bursts of sweetness that contrast beautifully with the smoky undertones of paprika and the richness of perfectly cooked lobster. Every bite tells a story, from the first crackle of the pan to the gentle embrace of the broth that binds it all together.

This paella is not just a dish—it’s a love letter to Mediterranean tradition, a celebration of life shared over good food and even better company. It’s an invitation to indulge, to savor, and to fall head over heels for both the flavors and the hands that bring it to life.

Let this paella take you on a journey you’ll never want to end.

What’s Christmas like for a guest on a beautiful Superyacht? With Courtesy of Erica Lay & The Mallorca Daily Bulletin. #24/0227.

December 20, 2024 · 4 min read

---

Erica Lay owner of EL CREW International Yacht Crew Agency http://www.elcrewco.com/

erica@elcrewco.com

What’s Christmas Like for a Guest on a Superyacht?

A Festive Celebration at Sea

The holiday season is magical wherever it’s celebrated, but spending Christmas aboard a superyacht takes it to another level. Imagine waking up to panoramic views of a secluded bay, the soft sound of waves against the hull, and a festive breakfast served on a sunlit aft deck. Whether cruising the Caribbean or anchored in the Maldives, Christmas on a superyacht combines the luxury of high-end living with the warmth of tradition, making it a truly unforgettable experience.

Decked Out for the Holidays

Superyachts are renowned for their bespoke design and customization, and this extends to holiday décor. Yacht crews often work closely with owners and charter guests to bring their festive visions to life.

A Floating Wonderland

From elegantly adorned Christmas trees to sparkling lights strung along railings, superyachts transform into floating winter wonderlands. Decorations are often tailored to complement the yacht’s interiors, blending traditional Christmas elements with the sophistication of luxury design. Fresh flowers, garlands, and candles add a festive yet intimate touch, while LED lighting ensures the mood is perfect, day or night.

Personalized Themes

Guests can opt for a traditional Christmas aesthetic or something entirely unique—think nautical-themed decorations with seashells and starfish or tropical vibes featuring palm fronds and exotic blooms. Some superyachts even feature snow machines for a wintry feel, no matter the climate. (The deck crew hates them, but the guests love them!)

A Culinary Extravaganza

No Christmas celebration is complete without a feast, and onboard a superyacht, the galley team goes above and beyond to create extraordinary dining experiences.

Custom Menus

The yacht chef crafts bespoke holiday menus tailored to guest preferences, often blending traditional dishes with local flavors. Whether it’s a classic roast turkey with all the trimmings, a Caribbean-inspired seafood platter, or indulgent desserts like Yule logs and Christmas puddings, the options are endless.

Festive Table Settings

The interior team sets the stage with beautiful table arrangements, featuring fine china, crystal glassware, and festive centerpieces. Attention to detail ensures every meal feels like a celebration, from breakfast to the grand Christmas dinner.

Activities for the Whole Family

Superyachts are designed for entertainment, and Christmas is no exception. The crew organizes a variety of activities to ensure everyone has a memorable holiday experience.

For the Kids

Children are treated to a magical holiday at sea, complete with Christmas stockings, cookie-decorating workshops, and visits from Santa Claus—who may arrive by tender, jet ski, or even helicopter! Crew members often dress up to make the experience extra special, ensuring that the youngest guests are immersed in the Christmas spirit.

For the Adults

Adults can enjoy holiday-themed cocktails on the sundeck, relax with festive movies in the onboard cinema, or indulge in spa treatments in the yacht’s wellness area. Some superyachts even have onboard carol singers or live music to enhance the ambiance.

Group Activities

From snorkeling excursions to beach barbecues, the itinerary often includes unique holiday experiences. Imagine unwrapping gifts on a secluded beach, enjoying a Christmas Eve bonfire under the stars, or participating in a friendly jet ski race with family and friends.

The Gift of Exploration

One of the greatest joys of Christmas aboard a superyacht is the ability to explore stunning destinations. Guests can wake up to a new view every day, whether it’s the turquoise waters of the Bahamas or the raw beauty of the Seychelles.

A Bespoke Itinerary

Guests and captains work together to design a custom itinerary that aligns with the holiday spirit. Popular options include:

• The Caribbean: Celebrate Christmas in sun-soaked islands like St. Barths, Antigua, or the Virgin Islands.

• The Maldives: Escape to private atolls for a truly secluded and luxurious holiday experience.

• The Pacific: For the more adventurous, seeking to get off the beaten track.

A Crew That Makes It Special

Behind every magical Christmas onboard a superyacht is a dedicated crew working tirelessly to ensure every detail is perfect. From decorating the yacht to organizing surprise gifts and creating unforgettable experiences, their professionalism and creativity shine during the holiday season. Big shout-out to our yacht crews!

Crews often go the extra mile, researching family traditions, favorite holiday songs, and even preferred wrapping paper styles to make the celebration feel personal and heartfelt. Their efforts transform the yacht into a home away from home, filled with warmth and joy.

The Spirit of the Season at Sea

Christmas on a superyacht isn’t just about luxury—it’s about creating cherished memories. Whether it’s a family gathering, a romantic escape, or a festive celebration with friends, the combination of world-class service, breathtaking surroundings, and heartfelt traditions ensures an experience like no other.

So, if you’re dreaming of a holiday filled with sun, sea, and unforgettable moments, there’s no better way to celebrate than aboard a superyacht. After all, the best gifts aren’t always under the tree—they’re the memories made with those you love, in the most extraordinary of settings.

The Luxury Prison: A Live-Aboard Odyssey by Chef Luis Rafael Hurtado. #24/0221.

December 17, 2024 · 2 min read

---

The Luxury Prison: A Live-Aboard Odyssey

Gather ’round, dear yachties and landlubbers alike, for the tragicomic tale of The Sole Stew Who Never Stepped Ashore—a gripping saga of high seas, endless shifts, and promises as hollow as the owner’s empathy tank.

It all began on a sunny day in Somewhere Expensive, when our protagonist—a bright-eyed, freshly hired sole stew—embarked on her grand adventure. The job description had promised glamour: impeccable sunsets, champagne-sipping guests, and up to 10 days off between busy periods. In yachtie terms, that clearly translated to: “10 minutes to cry in the laundry room while clutching a bottle of window cleaner.”

Now, picture her surprise when those magical 10 days off vanished into thin air—much like the fresh towels she mysteriously conjures from unknown dimensions.

“Oh, you wanted time off?” the owners must’ve scoffed. “Silly stew! Who needs rest when there are guests to entertain and placemats to realign?!”

And let’s not forget the hours:

7:30 AM to 11 PM. Every. Single. Day.

Even vampires are clocking fewer hours at this point.

Our stew—name withheld to protect her dignity (and her potential revenge plot)—finally dared to voice her concerns, gently mentioning the small, human need for rest.

“Rest? What is this… rest you speak of?” the owner likely whispered, squinting as though deciphering ancient hieroglyphics. “No. No rest for you.”

With a flick of their Rolex-clad wrist, the “meeting” was adjourned.

Thus began life in this peculiar floating purgatory—anchored permanently, like a teak-decked Alcatraz where white-glove service reigns supreme.

Think I’m being dramatic? Allow me to paint the scene:

• No stepping ashore.

• No walking beyond the boat’s boundaries.

• No mental reprieve from the madness.

She is Sisyphus, forever pushing her vacuum cleaner up the same carpeted hill, while guests demand more drinks, fluffier pillows, and perhaps a sprinkling of her sanity—just for garnish.

But wait! It’s not all doom and gloom. There are perks:

1. She’ll leave with the core strength of an Olympic gymnast from hauling trays 18 hours a day.

2. Her ability to smile while dying inside will rival that of a seasoned beauty queen.

3. She now possesses enough material for a Netflix dark comedy series: “Anchored in Agony.”

The real tragedy? She can’t leave. The cruel, capricious visa gods have ensured she stays bound, and a paycheck—no matter how small or soaked in tears—is still a paycheck.

So, dear yachtie comrades, what’s the moral of this salty saga?

Perhaps it’s this: Always clarify if “live aboard” means “never leave aboard.” And when someone promises, “Oh, you’ll definitely get days off,” just know that’s yacht-owner slang for: “We’ll pat you on the head and smile while you descend into madness.”

To our hero, still adrift in this gilded cage, we say: Stay strong. Find small joys in smudgeless cutlery and perfectly folded linens. Whisper your frustrations into the crisp pleat of a napkin. And if all else fails, remember this—you are now the undisputed master of survival on the high seas.

Anchors aweigh, sanity optional.

Yoga and Recovery: How Supplements Accelerate Healing. #24/0223.

December 17, 2024 · 2 min read

---

Did you know that combining yoga with the right nutrition can significantly shorten your recovery time after physical exertion?

For yacht personnel, physical fitness and rapid recovery are particularly important, as work onboard often involves long days and intensive physical activities. Yoga has proven to be an effective method to increase flexibility, reduce stress, and aid in body recovery.

The Importance of Yoga for Recovery

Yoga combines physical exercises with breathing techniques and meditation, leading to holistic body recovery. According to a study by Harvard Medical School, yoga can lower cortisol levels—a stress hormone that can slow down recovery. Additional benefits of yoga for recovery include:

1. Improved Circulation: Certain yoga poses enhance blood flow to muscles and organs, allowing nutrients to be transported more efficiently.
2. Increased Flexibility: Regular stretching makes muscles more supple, preventing injuries and supporting recovery.
3. Mental Balance: Yoga reduces stress and anxiety, positively affecting overall health and recovery.

How Supplements Accelerate Recovery

In addition to yoga, proper nutrition and targeted use of supplements can further enhance recovery. Especially for yacht personnel working under demanding conditions, supplements can help compensate for nutrient deficiencies.

1. Minerals: Magnesium and calcium are essential for muscle relaxation and function. Deficiencies can lead to cramps and delayed recovery.
2. Trace Elements: Zinc, iron, and selenium support the immune system and energy metabolism, crucial for swift recovery.
3. Vitamin D: Promotes muscle function and contributes to a healthy immune system, improving recovery after physical exertion.

FitLine Restorate Citrus for Optimal Recovery

To maximize your recovery, FitLine Restorate Citrus offers an ideal solution. This product combines high-quality minerals and trace elements like calcium, magnesium, iron, zinc, selenium, copper, manganese, chromium, and vitamin D.

1. Rich in Zinc: Contributes to normal acid-base metabolism and supports normal fertility.
2. Supports Metabolism: Zinc contributes to normal carbohydrate and fatty acid metabolism.
3. Boosts Immune System: Rich in vitamin D, which contributes to normal immune system function.
4. Exclusive Nutrient Transport Concept (NTC®): Ensures optimal absorption of nutrients in the body.

Conclusion

Combining yoga with targeted supplementation can significantly accelerate recovery—a crucial advantage for yacht personnel facing high physical demands. By incorporating FitLine Restorate Citrus into your daily routine, you’ll be well-prepared for the next challenges on board.

Yacht Business Focus on Mallorca. With Courtesy of Erica Lay & The Mallorca Bulletin. #24/0220.

December 13, 2024 · 4 min read

---

Erica Lay owner of EL CREW International Yacht Crew Agency http://www.elcrewco.com/ erica@elcrewco.com

YACHT BUSINESS FOCUS IN MALLORCA

Each week Erica Lay, owner of EL CREW CO International Yacht Crew Agency talks to people in the local yachting community. For more info on any of our stars featured here, you can contact Erica directly on erica@elcrewco.com  

_________________________

Today I’m speaking with Jared Smith, Owner/Manager or Chilling SL who build and rent cooling towers to yacht when they haul out for maintenance. This kit enables the yacht to keep fridges, air con and shore power running just like when they’re in the water. After a long yachting career, he moved ashore in 2007 to work for an engineering company. A few years (and sweaty projects later) he built his first cooling tower, and launched his business. 

1. What attracted you to the island? What do you like about living here?

 The lifestyle, culture, the food, the people. It is also a land of opportunity, for those with the courage and perseverance to see it through (I didn’t say it was easy).

2. What’s the hardest thing about living in Mallorca? –

The bureaucracy can be hard work and Spain is the worst place in Europe to be self-employed which is expensive and frustrating. Thankfully my wife deals with this side of things, I am just a dirt magnet with some plumbing skills.

3. What’s your background before you set up your business? – 

Born in England, lived in Germany, Singapore, New Zealand and finally my family settled in Australia. In 2002 after working on the Great Barrier Reef, Gold Coast, and managing a restaurant in Vietnam, I found myself working as mate on a 30m MY in Valencia. Our first stop? Palma. And the love affair began.

4. What’s your USP?

Currently we are the only business in the Balearics custom building and renting cooling towers for yachts. Many years of experience gives us the knowledge to provide the most suitable towers and how to manage the many technical aspects necessary to keep our machines compliantwith local government regulations. 

5. What’s the best thing about your job?

Having happy clients come back to us year after year. On new boats, being first in and last out. I like a good challenge and am always thinking of ways to do my job better, faster and easier than the last time. 

6. What’s the most challenging part of your job? 

Meeting demand; when it’s busy I have connected 4 boats in one day due to their yard schedules so I try to stay as organised as possible, but have to be flexible too. I don’t leave the yard until the job is done, so it’s in my best interest to get it done as quickly and cleanly as possible. 

7. If you could have any yacht in the world for a day, which one would you pick?

SY Elfje because she is beautiful, with my wife for all the support she has given me through the whole business adventure. She was the first person I spoke to about setting up cooling towers, and if it wasn’t for her positivity and support on that day, well…. There would be a lot more hot and sweaty boats than there are today.

8. What do you like to do when you’re not working?

 I like sailing, snorkelling, cooking and walking my dogs. 

9. What advice would you give to anyone looking to establish a yacht related business in Mallorca?

Learn Spanish. Never rely on a gestor, you need to know the law and what you are doing. Grow your business organically. Some are meteoric and burn out just as fast as they rise. A service-based business is reliant on you and your relationship with the client, make them happy and they will return. This takes time. Have a very thorough business plan, and find out everything you need to know before you pull the trigger. Do this by asking other entrepreneurs about their experiences, the bad and the good. Just remember the business you are building is all about you, and what you can do. You are the soul of the business, without your drive, passion and commitment it is nothing. Ask someone who has sold their business, it’s never the same without them.

10. Any stories, thoughts, or anything else you’d like to share feel free! –

The first time I encountered a cooling tower for boats, it tried to kill me. Lauderdale marine center in early 2002. I was mate/engineer on a 30m MY and we were beginning a 4 month yard period. A contractor was connecting a cooling tower to our AC plant, I was in the engine room bilge checking a sea chest for water flow. It had a thin clear perspexlid and I couldn’t see any water, it was air locked. I turned to the side and reached for my radio when the plastic lid shattered from the pressure and embedded a shard of itself in the engine room deck head. Right in line with where my face was a second earlier….. Kind of left a lasting impression. Years later in Mallorca after several sweaty and unbearablesummer refits working at YES engineering I asked someone why there weren’t any cooling towers. A blank look was my answer. Thats where it all began.

Transitioning to Shore-based Roles: Career Paths Beyond Yachting. With Courtesy of Erica Lay & The Mallorca Bulletin. #24/0208.

December 6, 2024 · 4 min read

---

Erica Lay owner of EL CREW International Yacht Crew Agency http://www.elcrewco.com/ erica@elcrewco.com

Transitioning to Shore-based Roles: Career Paths Beyond Yachting.

The superyacht industry is known for its allure, adventure, and the opportunity to travel the world. However, many experienced crew members eventually seek to transition to shore-based roles, whether for stability, personal growth, or new challenges. The skills and knowledge acquired while working on yachts are highly transferable, opening various alternative career paths in yacht management, brokerage, consultancy, and beyond. Here’s a brief guide to some of the prominent shore-based opportunities available for former yacht crew members.

Yacht Management

1. Fleet Management:

Fleet managers oversee multiple yachts, ensuring they operate smoothly and efficiently. This role involves coordinating maintenance, managing budgets, managing HR and crew, and ensuring compliance with maritime regulations. Former captains, engineers, and senior deck officers are particularly suited for this role due to their comprehensive understanding of yacht operations.

2. Operations Manager:

An operations manager handles the day-to-day logistics of running a yacht or fleet of yachts. Responsibilities include coordinating with suppliers, managing inventories, and ensuring the yacht is ready for charters or owner use. This role requires excellent organisational skills and the ability to multitask, making it an ideal fit for former chief stews or mates.

3. Yacht Project Manager:

Project managers oversee the construction, refit, or extensive maintenance of yachts. They work closely with shipyards, designers, and engineers to ensure projects are completed on time, within budget, and to the owner’s specifications. Experienced crew members with technical knowledge and project management skills can excel in this role.

Yacht Brokerage

1. Sales Broker:

Yacht sales brokers facilitate the buying and selling of yachts. They need to have a deep understanding of the market, excellent negotiation skills, and the ability to build strong client relationships. Former crew members with extensive industry knowledge and a broad network can transition smoothly into brokerage, leveraging their experience to provide valuable insights to clients.

2. Charter Broker:

Charter brokers specialise in arranging yacht charters for clients. They must understand client needs, recommend suitable yachts, and coordinate the charter process from start to finish. Former crew members who have worked on charter yachts have a distinct advantage, as they understand the charter experience from both the crew and guest perspectives.

3. New Build Broker:

New build brokers assist clients in commissioning new yachts. This role involves guiding clients through the design and construction process, liaising with shipyards, and ensuring the client’s vision is realised. Crew members with a strong background in yacht construction and refits are well-suited for this role.

Consultancy and Advisory Roles

1. Yacht Consultant:

Yacht consultants provide expert advice on a range of topics, from yacht design and construction to operational efficiency and crew management. Former senior crew members can leverage their extensive experience to offer valuable consultancy services to yacht owners, builders, and management companies.

2. Crew Recruitment Consultant:

With firsthand knowledge of the demands and dynamics of working on a yacht, former crew members can excel as crew recruitment consultants. They can help match the right crew with the right yacht, ensuring a good fit based on skills, experience, and personality.

3. Safety and Compliance Consultant:

Safety and compliance consultants ensure yachts adhere to international maritime regulations and safety standards. This role involves conducting safety audits, training crew, and advising on regulatory changes. Former captains, chief officers and engineers with a deep understanding of maritime laws and safety protocols are ideal candidates for this role.

Training and Education

1. Maritime Instructor:

Former yacht crew members can become instructors at maritime training academies, teaching the next generation of yacht crew. Roles can range from practical training in navigation and seamanship to specialised courses in safety, hospitality, and technical skills.

2. Private Yacht Trainer:

Private yacht trainers work directly with yacht owners and their crews, providing tailored training programs. This can include everything from advanced navigation techniques to guest service excellence, wilderness first aid to mental health management. Experienced crew members with a passion for teaching can thrive in this role.

Supporting Roles

1. Yacht Provisioner:

Provisioning specialists ensure yachts are stocked with the highest quality food, beverages, and supplies. Former chefs and stews with a keen eye for detail and extensive supplier networks are perfect for this role.

2. Luxury Travel Consultant:

Luxury travel consultants design bespoke travel experiences for high-net-worth individuals. With their understanding of the luxury market and attention to detail, former yacht crew can create extraordinary travel itineraries that include yacht charters, private jet travel, and exclusive accommodations.

Transitioning to shore-based roles offers former yacht crew members a pathway to use their unique skills and experiences while enjoying greater stability, a home life, and new challenges. Whether moving into yacht management, brokerage, consultancy, or education, the opportunities are vast and varied. The key to a successful transition lies in identifying one’s strengths, networking within the industry, and continuously seeking professional development. With the right approach, former yacht crew can embark on fulfilling careers that keep them connected to the maritime world they love.

The Saga of Carl: Gourmet Engineer and Living Nightmare by Chef Luis Rafael Hurtado. #24/0206.

December 2, 2024 · 3 min read

---

The Saga of Carl: Gourmet Engineer and Living Nightmare

Life on board a yacht is supposed to be glamorous—crystal-clear waters, sunsets worthy of postcards, and a crew that’s sharp, polished, and professional. And then there’s Carl, our onboard engineer. The only reason Carl still has this gig is that the owners don’t want to shell out more money for someone who knows which end of a wrench to use and how to fold a shirt.

Carl is a walking contradiction. He keeps the engines humming but can’t seem to maintain even basic hygiene in his room. The place hasn’t been cleaned since the yacht’s maiden voyage. Step inside, and you’ll find a biohazard zone disguised as a cabin. Old socks, mystery stains, and the faint odor of desperation blend into a symphony of horror. It’s as if Carl is conducting an experiment to see how much filth a human can survive. Spoiler: He’s winning.

Morning

Carl starts his day by stumbling into the galley like a sleep-deprived bear emerging from hibernation. He brews a cup of instant coffee so strong it could double as engine degreaser. Breakfast? A bizarre concoction of canned sausage, powdered eggs, and toast that somehow ends up both burnt and soggy. Carl calls it “rustic yacht fare.” We call it “hard to watch.”

Afternoon

When he’s not elbow-deep in engine grease, Carl likes to pretend he’s a gourmet chef. This involves raiding the galley for whatever isn’t bolted down and turning it into a dish only he dares to eat. One time, he made a “fusion pasta” with ketchup and instant ramen. Another time, he tried to sous vide a steak in the engine room. The results? Let’s just say the crew now has a strict No Carl in the Kitchen policy.

Let’s also talk about his room. The man lives like he’s actively auditioning for a reality show about hoarders. Dirty laundry is piled so high it’s practically a new bunkmate. Empty chip bags and soda cans litter the floor, creating a crunchy carpet of shame. He insists he’ll clean it “tomorrow,” but tomorrow—like Carl’s fitness goals—never comes.

Evening

By night, Carl swaps his overalls for what he calls “casual attire,” which is really just an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt that looks like it was purchased during a blackout sale. He lounges on the aft deck, puffing on a cigar he clearly can’t afford and swirling a glass of wine like he’s auditioning for Below Deck: The Budget Edition.

When the owners are aboard, Carl cranks up the charm—or what he thinks passes for charm. He leans into conversations with guests, regaling them with tales of his “chef skills” and “refined palate.” Meanwhile, the crew tries not to gag, knowing full well he eats cold spaghetti straight from the can when no one’s looking.

Why He’s Still Here

Let’s be honest—the only reason Carl still has a job is that he’s just competent enough to keep the engines running, and the owners don’t want to pay for someone better. So here we are, stuck with a man who can fix a diesel generator blindfolded but can’t figure out how to empty his trash bin.

Living with Carl is like sharing quarters with a tornado—it’s messy, chaotic, and leaves you questioning every life choice. But hey, at least the yacht’s engines work. For now.

FROM GALLEY TO GRANNY – What will be after yachting by Chef Tom Voigt. #24/0205.

December 1, 2024 · 2 min read

---

FROM GALLEY TO GRANNY – What Comes After Yachting?

St. Tropez, July 30, 2024 – After four decades navigating the high seas and catering to the whims of the super-rich, seasoned yacht chef Claire Dubois is contemplating hanging up her apron and retiring her paring knife.

At 78, Claire finds the physical toll of the job increasingly demanding. “I’ve flambéed more lobster than I can count, but my knees and back are starting to give up the ghost,” she jokes with a sardonic smile.

Claire’s illustrious career, marked by exotic locales and impeccable dishes, is coming to an end. The relentless pace has her contemplating a life ashore, but not without some peculiar habits. “I’ll miss strutting down the passerelle, so I’m having one installed in my house back home,” she says with a smirk. “Because why should the exit from my living room be any less grand?”

Retirement isn’t exactly smooth sailing. Without a formal pension plan, Claire faces an uncertain future. “Retirement for yacht crew is like Bigfoot,” she deadpans. “Everyone talks about it, but no one’s actually seen it.”

Claire plans to keep her radio by her side, even in the afterlife. “I might be six feet under, but I’ll still be tuning into maritime chatter,” she jokes. At home, she’ll stick to her old habits: labeling every box and item, sleeping with a safety evacuation plan taped to the wall above her bed, and keeping a life vest in her wardrobe. “Old habits die hard,” she says with a shrug.

Even in retirement, Claire’s quirks will persist. She’ll buy large quantities of groceries as if she’s feeding a crew, and she’ll call her husband “Captain” in their domestic haven. If her tumble dryer breaks, you can bet she’ll shout for an “Engineer,” expecting an immediate fix.

As Claire’s final voyage draws near, she remains humorously fatalistic. “Life after yachting might be different, but I’ve survived worse. Maybe I’ll finally get to write my tell-all book: ‘Boiling Point: Memoirs of a Yacht Chef.’”

We are thrilled to celebrate the 10-Year Anniversary of Sunshine Yacht Services St. Barths!

November 29, 2024 · 1 min read

---

Celebrating 10 Years of Sunshine Yacht Services St. Barths!

Dear All,

We are thrilled to celebrate the 10-Year Anniversary of Sunshine Yacht Services St. Barths!

With over 30 years of living on the island, we pride ourselves on being a truly local agency. Our extensive network of trusted contacts, reliable suppliers, and skilled island personnel ensures we deliver top-notch service. Resourceful, professional, and fair—we’re here for you 24/7.

As an owner-operated business, you will always deal directly with Marion Perry Balland, who brings unparalleled local expertise and a personal touch to every interaction.

• No hidden charges.

• No unnecessary fees.

• Just honest, transparent, and friendly service—by yachties, for yachties.

Thank you for choosing us and for being part of our journey!

Warm regards,

Marion Perry Balland

Sunshine Yacht Services St. Barths

Email: sunshineyachtservices@gmail.com

WhatsApp: +590 690 517 444

Family Owned and Operated